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Monday, July 15, 2013

I am a Heelist

There.  I said it.  I am a Heelist. This morning I went to the cabinet to get a slice of white bread for my breakfast.  It was a new loaf, and like all new loaves, it had a damned brown heel piece right there in my way.  I became irrationally angry at the sight of the heel. Never mind that I was going to toast my bread, and the taste would be the same.  Never mind that a heel is still part of the loaf - just looks a little different than the majority of the loaf.


Instead of eating the heel and getting on with my life, I huffed and pushed it aside so I could get to the more desirable next piece. I know that I will be irritated all the way through the loaf, every time I go to get more bread.  Just the sight of a heel irritates me.

Oh, and what happens at the end of the loaf?  That's right - there's another heel right there, just waiting.  And then what?  Two heels together.  Where does it end? An entire loaf of bread consisting of only heels????

Thursday, July 11, 2013

The Devil is in the details

Admit it.  This morning you woke up and said to yourself "Gee, I wonder what Ian would put into a playlist if he were going to reference the Devil?"

Well, I heard you.  And this is it:

Me and the Devil - Gil Scott-Heron
Sympathy for the Devil - Rolling Stones
Devil went down to Georgia - CDB (I don't really like this one, but it has to be included)
Christmas with the Devil - Spinal Tap
Friend of the Devil - Grateful Dead
Devil Song - Beth Orton
Run Devil Run - Jenny Lewis
Some Devil - Dave Matthews
Angels and Devils - Echo and the Bunnymen (that other Liverpool band)
Devils Food - Alice Cooper

I don't know why you were thinking about this.  Kind of weird, really.